Saturday, July 22, 2006

Wingnuts on the Right.

One of the typical theocon candidates for the Republican Party is Jason Atkinson who wants to be Governor of Oregon. Now there is nothing to bring Atkinson to the attention of this blog except part of his "war on crime" package that he promises voters. He says that as governor he will "reverse Oregon's reputation for being 'terrorist friend,' and will use his office to insure all Oregon cities work closely with federal authorities to share information about potential terrorist threats."

Now who knew that Oregon was "terrorist friendly"? This may explain why George Bush can't even capture Osama bin Laden. Instead of looking in Afghanistan (if they are even bothering) he should be checking out the Starbucks in Portland.

I suspect that "terrorist friendly" is used by the authoritarian Right to describe any state that won't trample the Bill of Rights ala George Bush.

Or were there a series of terror attacks in Oregon that I didn't hear about?

I doubt it. It just sounds like another rabid Republican trying to wave the bloody shirt of 9/11 so he can trash the Bill of Rights. But to show how sincere Mr. Atkinson is about weeding out terrorists we have compiled this photo montage of his efforts.

Here Candidate Atkinson is seen flying over Oregon keeping an ever vigilant eye out for bin Laden. At this point we see him double checking that there are no terrorists in the back of the plane. The plane flys in circles as a search pattern but then it must as it only has a right wing and no left wing.

No house is ignored in Atkinson's extensive door to door search to root out all terrorist friendly Oregonians. In this case the home owners were shown to be loyal, God-fearing Republicans and Atkinson is crossing them off his list of potential suspects.

Someone's Gran or terrorist? Only extensive question by Jason Atkinson will allow Oregonians to sleep sound at night knowing that Atkinson and God are ever vigilant.

The chair looks empty but only to the untrained eye. To those dedicated to stamping out the terrorist friendly reputation of Oregon this chair could be weapon of mass destruction.

Every potential terrorist must be interrogated. Such vigilance will make sure that they don't retire in Oregon but move on to California where they belong.

It may appear like a normal fish to you and me. But Jason Atkinson knows that in terrorist friendly Oregon it could be the means to deliver deadly poisons to the water supply. In the new Oregon of Atkinson no fish will go uninvestigated in order to put an end to the terrorist attacks in Oregon. (That you haven't heard of any such attacks is just proof how the media is controlled by Godless liberals.)

When this pheasant couldn't name the winner of the World Series it was deemed to be either a terrorist or an illegal immigrant, both of whom need the stern hand of the law applied to them. Here Candidate Atkinson shows what will happen to any suspect who can't prove their innocence. Justice will be firm and swift.

No terrorism here but those shoes have the crew from Queer Eye cringing in fear.