Politician, "family values" man, sex fiend.

Mike Duvall is one of those Theopublicans, that combination of a Republican and a theocrat. Duvall had a reputation because he was strongly opposed to equal marriage rights for gay couples. Duvall shouted that his position was because he supports traditional family values. The Religious-Right group, Capitol Resource Institute, praised Duvall as a “consistent trooper” who “has voted time and time again to protect and preserve family values in California.” Remember, that in Christianese, that family doesn’t mean family, not in the sense most people mean. It only means hetereosexuals. Apparently gay people are without families.

Duvall was, as expected, a supporter of the hateful Proposition 8. He is a Christian, who would have prayer in public in the state assembly. He was also something of a sex fiend and a pervert, as least by “family values” standards.

Mr. Duvall was sitting a meeting room at the state capitol chatting with someone. The microphone in front of him was on as the hearing was about to be broadcast. Duvall launched into a bragging sessions about screwing two women, neither of whom are his wife. To make it worse, it appears that one of them, and possibly both of them, are lobbyists in Sacramento. So, instead of giving Duvall inappropriate cash bribes to vote their way, they apparently were giving him a horizontal rumba instead. Duvall bragged about cheating on his wife and, in the same conversation, bragged about cheating on his mistress as well. But hey, they’re women, so he’s still a “family values” kind of guy.

Duvall got caught. Of course many “family values” politicians just haven’t been caught—yet. Duvall apologized, but not for the affairs, not for the inappropriate relationships with a lobbyist, not for cheating on his wife, but for “the comments I made in what I believed to be a private conservation.” So he’s sorry he said something and got caught but not sorry about lying to his wife, lying to his mistress, or any the violtions of common sense ethics for a politician. He’s just sorry he said something, not sorry he did something.

Duvall whined: “This is a private matter and I asked that everyone respect the privacy of all involved.” Really! What cheek!

Duvall is a conservative and today’s religiously-obsessed Right do not believe that one’s sex life is a “private matter.” Mr. Duvall has regularly voted on policies making the private lives of others a matter of state concern. You would think that whether two people marry one another is a “private matter” that ought to be left to “all involved.” Mr. Duvall said it wasn’t. He wanted state legislation banning some couples from making that “private” decision.

This is typical of conservatives. Their sex life is a private matter. Your sex life is a matter of state regulation.

I’m glad this moralistic, two-faced, lying theocrat has resigned his office. He deserves the shame and the ridicule. But, since he chose to use his state office to bed a lobbyist who was employed to secure his votes, I suggest that much more ought to be coming. Duvall ought to face legal charges. No one seems to think these female lobbyists were screwing Duvall because of his looks or physique—he’s fat and old. But he had what every lobbyist wants—a vote in the state assembly. And that changes the dynamics. I suggest the lobbyists traded sex for influence and Duvall traded influence for sex. It was an act of prostitution with both Duvall and the lobbyists all playing the whore.

I just wish some of these Republicans would start talking about how sex is a “private matter” before they caught in some scandal.

Photo: Duvall: it was Brad Pitt looks that got him screwed.